There are NO justified resentments.

[Original_Intent]

Disclaimer: I still carry some resentments. So I am FAR from perfect in this regard.

I am posting it here because i think many carry resentments towards LDS church leaders and others. A lot of energy is wasted here on venting the resentments held against them. I understand it, I feel it to some extent. But we must get past it.

[tribrac]

I understand the principle, but before I watch the video.. what does it say about those who were abused as children? And the abuser has never seen justice, but maintains a level of control over his victims.

[Original_Intent]

I understand the principle, but before I watch the video.. what does it say about those who were abused as children? And the abuser has never seen justice, but maintains a level of control over his victims.

It doesn't address it specifically. I'd recommend the video.

I realize in circumstances like what you are describing and even in the case of feeling abused by church leaders over a lifetime - it is tempting to say "that's easy for you to say!" and in truth it is of course easier said than done.

But I am convinced of the correctness of the principle. That doesn't make it easy, as I have said, I carry a lot of resentment. In the last 24 hours I have thought in my heart about certain people and thinking that I will see them before the judgement bar of God, and demand "justice".

Justice either will or will not be done. Spending a lifetime nursing a grievance only harms us and hinders our progression.

[tribrac]

I wonder if the abused, who are trying to follow Christ, feel abused twice.

The pain of the abuse, and the struggle to forgive.

I've heard people tell of being overcome with joy and freedom when they are finally able to let go. But some people try a lifetime and can't find the strength to let it go and give it to Jesus.

[zionssuburb]

I loved a conference talk that specifically related to this:

https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/stu ... n?lang=eng

"Much of our suffering is not necessarily our fault. Unexpected events, contradicting or disappointing circumstances, interrupting illness, and even death surround us and penetrate our mortal experience. Additionally, we may suffer afflictions because of the actions of others.3 Lehi noted that Jacob had “suffered … much sorrow, because of the rudeness of [his] brethren.”4 Opposition is part of Heavenly Father’s plan of happiness. We all encounter enough to bring us to an awareness of our Father’s love and of our need for the Savior’s help.

The Savior is not a silent observer. He Himself knows personally and infinitely the pain we face.

“He suffereth the pains of all men, yea, the pains of every living creature, both men, women, and children.”5

“Let us therefore come boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need.”6

Sometimes in the depth of pain, we are tempted to ask, “Is there no balm in Gilead; is there no physician there?”7 I testify the answer is yes, there is a physician. The Atonement of Jesus Christ covers all these conditions and purposes of mortality."

[Cruiserdude]

I wonder if the abused, who are trying to follow Christ, feel abused twice.

The pain of the abuse, and the struggle to forgive.

I've heard people tell of being overcome with joy and freedom when they are finally able to let go. But some people try a lifetime and can't find the strength to let it go and give it to Jesus.

The Lord loves them just as much. The Lord already did it, He won, He overcame, He told us to let go and to grab onto Him and He will carry the burden, He wasn't just speaking a platitude or just speaking symbolically. It's on us to move forward. We're allowed to choose for ourselves..... And if we don't let go, that's okay too, He still loves us just as much, we'll just have to suffer more unnecessary hardships. But that's okay, this is just temporary mortal probation. He did it, He overcame and He offers us His peace and rest.
We're so focused on our own little mortal earthly experience that we lose the eternal perspective and totality of it all.
And as OP says, there is no justified resentment. It's true. There just isn't. (I didn't watch the video either yet, lol)

[Telavian]

This is a true principle, but is much harder in reality. Every single day we have the opportunity to decide the person we want to be that day.

[Reluctant Watchman]

Do we confuse the term resentment? We can pray for our enemies, or the enemies of righteousness, yet still hold fast to principle.

Resentment : bitter indignation at having been treated unfairly.

What one may perceive as resentment, may be simply be a disagreement with the policy or practices of a person or religion. Am I bitter toward the church? I don't think so. I've felt pain and sorrow for what they've done. I think lies cause suffering. I think many saints are in spiritual bondage. Choosing to be vocal about various people, policies, or doctrines does not mean we have been treated unfairly. I thank God every day for opening my eyes and teaching me personally. I'm grateful to be able to see such contrasts in viewpoints and opinions.

[Cruiserdude]

Disclaimer: I still carry some resentments. So I am FAR from perfect in this regard.

I am posting it here because i think many carry resentments towards LDS church leaders and others. A lot of energy is wasted here on venting the resentments held against them. I understand it, I feel it to some extent. But we must get past it.

The first two minutes are SPOT ON. Still listening
Edit: whole thing is excellent

[Thinker]

Disclaimer: I still carry some resentments. So I am FAR from perfect in this regard...
[youtube]

Thanks for the touching story. Heard it before but brought tears again. We just never fully know what others are going through - & we can be hope and the reason others believe in goodness of people.

As the saying goes, “Resentment is like swallowing poison and expecting the other person to die.” So I get the advise to let go of resentment as soon as you can. But I also understand that righteous anger is justified. Anger serves a purpose - to right wrongs and protect. Some unrepentant people in my life who have done things that could have landed them in jail, have called me names, put me down & accused me of holding on to resentment - all because I confronted them & maintain boundaries with them. Anyone who has been raised with people who have Borderline Personality Disorder knows boundaries are a must - especially if they selected you as their scapegoat.

I like Buddhism (which Wayne Dyer seemed to subscribe to) for things like meditation and “right livelihood,” but I disagree with the notion of non-attachment. For 1 thing “feelings buried alive never die” but tend to become expressed in more harmful ways like dis-ease. Not to suggest all disease is mind-body but note how Dyer died of cancer & cancer metaphysically can be “deep hurt, long-standing resentment, deep secret grief eating away at self…” It’s important to validate our own feelings - though not necessarily actions. Often the only way to move past feelings is to validate them.

As far as church leaders, many of us try to have boundaries but because we live with or around so many who are indoctrinated, it’s difficult. So venting is understandable & I sometimes do too, but I also sometimes just try to focus on more positive things, threads etc.

[FrankOne]

Resentment does nothing but punish the one holding it.

[4Joshua8]

Matthew 6
14 For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you:
15 But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.

I hope I’ve forgiven everyone. I don’t really carry resentment around with me about anyone, maybe a little towards myself sometimes and sometimes towards a relative who gets on my nerves repeatedly…. But I forgive and forgive again. I hope I’m in a good place with this.

Best wishes to everyone considering letting go of resentment. It’s worth it.

[JohnnyL]

I wonder if the abused, who are trying to follow Christ, feel abused twice.

The pain of the abuse, and the struggle to forgive.

I've heard people tell of being overcome with joy and freedom when they are finally able to let go. But some people try a lifetime and can't find the strength to let it go and give it to Jesus.

True--but I don't know if it has to do with strength.

I have some ideas (not understanding the plan, not enough faith, pain, negative emotions associated with the problem, negative emotions associated with the body, etc.), but I don't know why for sure for everyone.

I have found that EFT tapping is very helpful for forgiving ourselves and forgiving others.

[LateOutOfBed]

Love this video. Thanks for sharing. I've been trying to follow that principle closely for many years. It's definitely been a huge blessing in my life to let go of any and all resentment.

[The Red Pill]

Disclaimer: I still carry some resentments. So I am FAR from perfect in this regard.

I am posting it here because i think many carry resentments towards LDS church leaders and others. A lot of energy is wasted here on venting the resentments held against them. I understand it, I feel it to some extent. But we must get past it.

Wait...now you need to ask a fundamental question to yourself here...In all this talk of being "Christ like" are you forgetting that Christ HIMSELF showed a huge amount of hostility and resentment toward the Pharisees??

Now ask another question...why???

The answer is obvious...and repeated numerous times in scripture...THEY WERE HYPOCRITES.

They were masquerading as men of God, but were NOT.

Now, I have no problem with a TRUE prophet saying things that are true and predicting things that come true...like Isaiah.

BUT, I have a massive problem with men saying that something is "safe and effective", a "Godsend" and urge their entire membership to partake of it...when in reality...it's a deadly poison that has killed and injured millions.

Yet...continue to spout the LIE that they can't lead you astray.

THEY ALREADY DID!!!!!!!

I am going to call them out until my last dying breath for this utter HYPOCRISY.

[4Joshua8]

Disclaimer: I still carry some resentments. So I am FAR from perfect in this regard.

I am posting it here because i think many carry resentments towards LDS church leaders and others. A lot of energy is wasted here on venting the resentments held against them. I understand it, I feel it to some extent. But we must get past it.

Wait...now you need to ask a fundamental question to yourself here...In all this talk of being "Christ like" are you forgetting that Christ HIMSELF showed a huge amount of hostility and resentment toward the Pharisees??

Now ask another question...why???

The answer is obvious...and repeated numerous times in scripture...THEY WERE HYPOCRITES.

They were masquerading as men of God, but were NOT.

Now, I have no problem with a TRUE prophet saying things that are true and predicting things that come true...like Isaiah.

BUT, I have a massive problem with men saying that something is "safe and effective", a "Godsend" and urge their entire membership to partake of it...when in reality...it's a deadly poison that has killed and injured millions.

Yet...continue to spout the LIE that they can't lead you astray.

THEY ALREADY DID!!!!!!!

I am going to call them out until my last dying breath for this utter HYPOCRISY.

Call out the hypocrisy and tell the truth, even turning over tables in the temple, without carrying the heavy burden of bitter indignation towards others. I have lots to be resentful about, and I used to fiercly hold on to resentment. It nearly destroyed me. Fight the battle, yes, but forgive.

[Luke]

Disclaimer: I still carry some resentments. So I am FAR from perfect in this regard.

I am posting it here because i think many carry resentments towards LDS church leaders and others. A lot of energy is wasted here on venting the resentments held against them. I understand it, I feel it to some extent. But we must get past it.

Wait...now you need to ask a fundamental question to yourself here...In all this talk of being "Christ like" are you forgetting that Christ HIMSELF showed a huge amount of hostility and resentment toward the Pharisees??

Now ask another question...why???

The answer is obvious...and repeated numerous times in scripture...THEY WERE HYPOCRITES.

They were masquerading as men of God, but were NOT.

Now, I have no problem with a TRUE prophet saying things that are true and predicting things that come true...like Isaiah.

BUT, I have a massive problem with men saying that something is "safe and effective", a "Godsend" and urge their entire membership to partake of it...when in reality...it's a deadly poison that has killed and injured millions.

Yet...continue to spout the LIE that they can't lead you astray.

THEY ALREADY DID!!!!!!!

I am going to call them out until my last dying breath for this utter HYPOCRISY.

Speaking the truth by calling out hypocrisy has got nothing whatever to do with having resentment.

[Shawn Henry]

If you didn't make it to the 8-minute mark to hear the story of Teddy, it is powerful. I bawled like a baby.

[Shawn Henry]

I am going to call them out until my last dying breath for this utter HYPOCRISY.

What Luke said.

Speaking the truth by calling out hypocrisy has got nothing whatever to do with having resentment.

[Momma J]

I wonder if the abused, who are trying to follow Christ, feel abused twice.

The pain of the abuse, and the struggle to forgive.

I've heard people tell of being overcome with joy and freedom when they are finally able to let go. But some people try a lifetime and can't find the strength to let it go and give it to Jesus.

I was sexually abused as a pre-teen girl. I held on to the anger and resentment for 30 some years. It did not always rear it's ugly head, but it lurked in the depths. Then my sister and I talked it out. We decided to talk to the person and get resolution. Upon talking with him, I felt his remorse and forgave him. I instantly felt a heavy weight lifted from me.

My sister was furious. She went on to tell others that I forgave him because I enjoyed the abuse.

This is hurting me more than the initial abuse. This betrayal cuts deeper for some reason. Perhaps because she has always been my best friend. I am trying so hard to let go of this.... it is a real battle. I need to have another heart to heart with my sister, but I am now less comfortable being emotionally vulnerable with her like I was in the past.

I too am far from perfect.

[The Red Pill]

"I am posting it here because i think many carry resentments towards LDS church leaders"

This WAS the stated motivation of the OP. In other words...don't hold ANY resentments over what they have done.

I for one, am grateful that the founding fathers hung onto enough resentment to break free from the tyranny of the king.

We should resent bad behavior enough that the perpetrators are held accountable. Our entire system of law and justice is based on this principle.

It is actually evil to promote total forgiveness of bad behavior without accountability. In San Francisco, you can steal up to $1000 dollars of merchandise out of a store...with no arrest....no accountability. This is a recipe for total society breakdown.

The church leaders have not apologized...even arrogantly stated they DON'T apologize. There has been ZERO accountability for their bad behavior...and now the message of just forget the whole thing...or you're the bad guy if you don't.

Sorry, but that is a recipe for utter disaster.

[SJR3t2]

I personally don't hold any resentments, but I am here to warn and to call out their evils, https://seekingyhwh.org/resources/lds/. I enjoyed my time as an LDS / Brighamite member, https://seekingyhwh.org/2015/01/18/lds- ... on-letter/. I do see most members trying to do the best they know how, just as members of pretty much every church in the world.

[harakim]

"I am posting it here because i think many carry resentments towards LDS church leaders"

This WAS the stated motivation of the OP. In other words...don't hold ANY resentments over what they have done.

I for one, am grateful that the founding fathers hung onto enough resentment to break free from the tyranny of the king.

We should resent bad behavior enough that the perpetrators are held accountable. Our entire system of law and justice is based on this principle.

It is actually evil to promote total forgiveness of bad behavior without accountability. In San Francisco, you can steal up to $1000 dollars of merchandise out of a store...with no arrest....no accountability. This is a recipe for total society breakdown.

The church leaders have not apologized...even arrogantly stated they DON'T apologize. There has been ZERO accountability for their bad behavior...and now the message of just forget the whole thing...or you're the bad guy if you don't.

Sorry, but that is a recipe for utter disaster.

You can kill without hate and you can reprove without resentment.

"Reproving betimes with sharpness, when moved upon by the Holy Ghost; and then showing forth afterwards an increase of love toward him whom thou hast reproved, lest he esteem thee to be his enemy;"

You don't have to feel bad. Things are the way they are and (I assume) it's not your fault. You create your reality. If you want to create a reality of bitterness and fear, then that's sad. However, you can create a reality of empowerment and helping others and get better results. In neither of them do you accept bad behavior. In both scenarios, you can call out the bad behavior. The only difference is in one you are full of bad feelings and no one trusts you and in the other you are full of good feelings and people might listen to you.

[Thinker]

"I am posting it here because i think many carry resentments towards LDS church leaders"

This WAS the stated motivation of the OP. In other words...don't hold ANY resentments over what they have done.

I for one, am grateful that the founding fathers hung onto enough resentment to break free from the tyranny of the king.

We should resent bad behavior enough that the perpetrators are held accountable. Our entire system of law and justice is based on this principle.

It is actually evil to promote total forgiveness of bad behavior without accountability. In San Francisco, you can steal up to $1000 dollars of merchandise out of a store...with no arrest....no accountability. This is a recipe for total society breakdown.

The church leaders have not apologized...even arrogantly stated they DON'T apologize. There has been ZERO accountability for their bad behavior...and now the message of just forget the whole thing...or you're the bad guy if you don't.

Sorry, but that is a recipe for utter disaster.

Good points! Thank you for kind-of voicing a less popular but equally true perspective.

It’s not all-or nothing. Bipolar/Polarized, “either-or” thinking has been taught in church. “The church is EITHER true OR not… You are EITHER on the Lord’s side (church leader’s side) OR you’re not.” The truth is before there was light, it was dark… every rose has its thorn, and countless other yinyang stuff. Yet in the church, 1/2 of reality is not only ignored but if anyone dares point it out, they are punished… “Pointing out evil = contention… and quietly going along with evil = good.” In a situation in which gaslighting persists, it is imperative to speak truth - both pleasant and unpleasant.

Maybe one of the reasons why Utah has led the nation in mental illness and Ponzi schemes is because of this BS idea that you must pretend everything’s a-ok when it isn’t. Of course recognizing the negatives doesn’t mean we should focus on and obsess over them. But to ignore them is worse. Ignor-ance is the root of evil…

“Forgive them for they know not what they do.” For-give - is to GIVE yourself to go FORward. Maybe part of what Christ was saying, is get away from people who are willfully ignorant - who refuse to look within themselves and take accountability. Not that we should be mean - but keep the greatest commandments in loving the God of truth & loving others as well as ourselves. If others - even if by their own lack of self awareness- keep hurting us, we cannot control them but must do what we can to protect ourselves & those we’re responsible for. To some, especially who may be a bit ignorant, healthy boundaries may look like resentment.

[Thinker]

Resentment is “bitterness at having been mistreated”… PAST TENSE. It applies to things that happened in the past and no longer are currently happening.

Are church leaders no longer financially corrupt?

Are church leaders no longer systematically covering up child sex abuse?

Are GA’s no longer teaching evil like cult mentality that causes depression, anxiety, suicide, breaks up relationships etc… (or at the least it stunts growth to that of teenage-type-thinking -Fowler faith stage 3)?

Are church leaders no longer engaging in unrighteous dominion - misusing their power/position (- ie illegal medical coercion - so “amen to the priesthood of those men”)?

Are church leaders no longer following evil ways like refusing to “issue apologies” - not repenting & punishing anyone who dares hint that they need to repent?

This evil goes uncorrected & becomes worse. Lies about lying etc. They continue to harm people and so it’s not about resentment which deals with ONLY the past, not present. They are STILL abusing their authority to do evil. So, anger (to right wrongs) is justified. Ideally, we selectively distribute our energy & not allow anger to harm us - but rather use it sparingly to try to bring about necessary repentance and needed improvement.