Here is my response to Mamabear via message a few weeks ago to here question posed above.
I'm answering here, because I don't believe it is helpful to share this in the public space, acting as if she isn't in the room. It treats teh person one is potentially talking about as if they are nothing, further increasing their anxiety as a person in that type of situation often lacks confidence in themselves in some way. (my additional thoughts here not included in the message to mamabear - for whatever reason it popped into my head to share this today, here which is against what I normally like to do, but I trust in what I am receiving and if I am wrong in what I am doing, then I suppose I will accept my own hypocrisy and repent and hope I do not continue in that path- additional thoughts will be italicized) The way I am quoting this is not intended to be focused on Emily but on helping others in general.
To clarify, What I said is people who say "You need help" aren't helping - it is almost always coming from a place of judgment and usually it is a way to wash their hands clean of something - "You need help, I don't want to do it or invest time in it, so go find it yourself" is usually what we are saying, whether we want to admit it or not. We do this all the time in church with people "Well I just hope you find Jesus." Are you kidding me? Someone who doesn't want to hear about it isn't gonna take that comment as loving (because we are usually judgmental when we say it and don't actually hope for htem they find Jesus, but that they stop doing what they are doing, for our benefit) and most often we don't say it lovingly it is condescending. We are supposed to be the light of hte world, representing Him. It isn't about "finding Him" it is about believing Him, and manifesting Him to others, we just gave them another reason not to believe, because we claim we bear His name, but don't act like it. but I digress.
Ask yourself - If you don't want help yourself and you don't believe you need it, what convinces you to get help? What convinces you that you finally need to change? Either hit rock-bottom and see your own awful situation, or someone who genuinely loves you which cracks the pride that holds you in the position you are in, because (the source) it is so sincere and even if you lash out at them they still respond in love, it is life changing.
Prayers of course help - as long as they aren't "Dear God, this person is just crazy, they need your help, help them find some medicine because they are just crazy" That type of prayer doesn't care about the person even though it is at least a prayer and may be well intentioned.. Perhaps approaching hte Lord from the perspective of "Lord they seem to be really struggling with fear right now. All around them they are beset. I know your perfect love casts out all fear, Shower them with your love Lord and if there is anyway that I might share the love that you have for them, grant me grace that I might do so, that I might show them how much you love them, because I know you love them. YOu know all your children father and care about them. Thank you for loving her, that she isn't lost in her sight, even though all we see is a problem, Father you see in her potential and life. Help me to see that and to bring it out of her in your name, to help her see who she really is in your sight, that she might know you more and not fear so much. I ask for your grace and guidance Lord to treat her as you would treat her and to see her as you see her, so I might deliver whatever messages you think she needs. You know all things Lord, scripture says the Spirit knows all things that we need, so I ask that I might have that faith and if it be thy will to deliver what she needs by the Spirit to her.
The one thing most people that are struggling with in these situations is fear. Whether it is of the devil and evil spirits, whether it is of their sins and they believe they can't be forgiven, or a fear that they will be alone and everyone else will be in hell, it is almost always a common theme. They are afraid of death because of what they might find etc.. The Truth sets us free. I honestly don't believe there is a "set path" or "perfect" way to help someone, because they are individualistic. It may be in one instance just giving them a hug and telling htem they are loved (done wiht sincerity and no guile i.e. for them, not because you should "do it") and you are willing to lay down your life for them and if what they believe is true, you are more than willing ot defend them. It may be in another person, us listening and hearing all they believe is scary and then teach about the Lord and How He gave His life so we might not fear and through Him we can overcome fear and that the Lord overcame all things and He has given us His name so even when we are beset on all sides, God is still our shield even when we don't see and that faith and truth sets us free. In another it may be asking questions about why they perceive what they perceive and what it is about that situation that cause them to see it the way they do and encourage them to bear the name of Christ that all suffer for His sake if they are His and again in others it may be embracing them and telling them God loves them and casting out by revelation (faith through love). It is by revelation and love. We must exercise faith through love and not do it because we think they are weird or cast off, but because God loves them and He knows them and we love them as God does.
I'm not saying it is easy either, because we are constantly battling our false traditions, it takes us giving up what we think and accepting what God thinks. Clearly some have done good things and have sought Emily out in love, they have prayed in sincerity for her, - perhaps the answer, for not just Emily but all people who struggle isn't to just ask God to "help them" with their issues, but Ask GOd for guidance of hte Holy Spirit to ask for what they need, for the HOly Spirit already knws what we have need of and we know if it tells us to pray for a specific thing, it iwll be answered and they will be blessed...
