Humor - what's so funny?

[Momma J]

Ignoring the "Still Small Voice"

Before working in the hot sun this weekend, I made a quick prayer asking for protection from the brutal heat. I was cutting branches off of a downed tree so that we could more easily cut the larger pieces for firewood. I was keeping hydrated and there was a slight breeze.... but the heat index was 112.

.... I got this urge to shut it down and go inside and cool off. I ignored the promptings, as I wanted to finish the pile that I was working on.

.... Promptings to go inside and cool down came again, and I attested the promptings to my weakness in finishing the task.

.... Then BLAM the sudden loud crack of lightening deafened me for a moment. I sprinted for the house, feeling the Earth tingling under my feet (or so it was in my mind)

Blue skies, not a cloud to be seen.

.... and the little voice in my head said, "Why do you need such promptings before following the guidance you are given?"

[HVDC]

Ignoring the "Still Small Voice"

Before working in the hot sun this weekend, I made a quick prayer asking for protection from the brutal heat. I was cutting branches off of a downed tree so that we could more easily cut the larger pieces for firewood. I was keeping hydrated and there was a slight breeze.... but the heat index was 112.

.... I got this urge to shut it down and go inside and cool off. I ignored the promptings, as I wanted to finish the pile that I was working on.

.... Promptings to go inside and cool down came again, and I attested the promptings to my weakness in finishing the task.

.... Then BLAM the sudden loud crack of lightening deafened me for a moment. I sprinted for the house, feeling the Earth tingling under my feet (or so it was in my mind)

Blue skies, not a cloud to be seen.

.... and the little voice in my head said, "Why do you need such promptings before following the guidance you are given?"

Very relatable.

Similar results.

Sir H

[Ymarsakar]

I obey my callings and quests very promptly now.

[Niemand]

When you use ChatGPT to do your homework (3 mins)

[Niemand]

Just Stop Oil's gathering (who paid for it?) gets disrupted. For reference, these folk have disrupted the Chelsea Flower Show and various events.

(Under five minutes)

[Niemand]

.

[madvin]

climate.jpg

[Niemand]

.

[Momma J]

I have been prompted to learn other languages. Living in Texas, Spanish is a logical choice. It is coming along slowly....

I mentioned to our warehouse manager, who is from San Salvador, that I am having problems retaining. One of his helpers chimed in that I need to watch Telemundo.

Warehouse manager exclaimed, "NO!!!! She will become a Liberal!!!

[HVDC]

I have been prompted to learn other languages. Living in Texas, Spanish is a logical choice. It is coming along slowly....

I mentioned to our warehouse manager, who is from San Salvador, that I am having problems retaining. One of his helpers chimed in that I need to watch Telemundo.

Warehouse manager exclaimed, "NO!!!! She will become a Liberal!!!

True.

And so true.

Sir H

[Niemand]

I have been prompted to learn other languages. Living in Texas, Spanish is a logical choice. It is coming along slowly....

I mentioned to our warehouse manager, who is from San Salvador, that I am having problems retaining. One of his helpers chimed in that I need to watch Telemundo.

Warehouse manager exclaimed, "NO!!!! She will become a Liberal!!!

I met a very pleasant and intelligent Indian some years ago who complained Bollywood was used as a standin for Indian culture all the time. The right on white types would pretend to like Bollywood films to be "inclusive" etc etc. But he was quite adamant thar Bollywood was all disposable trash, and that it was of no worth whatsoever. It was interesting to hear him make that point, because if I'd made the same one, I'd be condemned for it!

[Silver Pie]

I have been prompted to learn other languages. Living in Texas, Spanish is a logical choice. It is coming along slowly....

I mentioned to our warehouse manager, who is from San Salvador, that I am having problems retaining. One of his helpers chimed in that I need to watch Telemundo.

Warehouse manager exclaimed, "NO!!!! She will become a Liberal!!!

There was a sister missionary years ago in a South American country talking in church. She was trying to say, "I'm embarrassed" [to be speaking in public] (something like that), but she didn't know the word for embarrassed and said "embarazada" which means pregnant - so she essentially said, "I'm pregnant." The audience was uncomfortable, until the error was realized.

A false friends couplet in regards to Spanish: Sopa no es soap, ropa no es rope, and butter is mantequilla ("meant to kill ya" is how it kind of sounds in English).



Sopa is soup
Ropa is clothing

[Niemand]

I have been prompted to learn other languages. Living in Texas, Spanish is a logical choice. It is coming along slowly....

I mentioned to our warehouse manager, who is from San Salvador, that I am having problems retaining. One of his helpers chimed in that I need to watch Telemundo.

Warehouse manager exclaimed, "NO!!!! She will become a Liberal!!!

There was a sister missionary years ago in a South American country talking in church. She was trying to say, "I'm embarrassed" [to be speaking in public] (something like that), but she didn't know the word for embarrassed and said "embarazada" which means pregnant - so she essentially said, "I'm pregnant." The audience was uncomfortable, until the error was realized.

A false friends couplet in regards to Spanish: Sopa no es soap, ropa no es rope, and butter is mantequilla ("meant to kill ya" is how it kind of sounds in English).

Sopa is soup
Ropa is clothing

And pregunta doesn't mean pregnant.

You have to be careful about translating things literally. If you say, "I am hot" in German, it means you are horny. If you say "I am cold" in Mongolian, apparently it means you have syphilis/gonorrhea.

[Silver Pie]

If you say "I am cold" in Mongolian, apparently it means you have syphilis/gonorrhea.

Wow!

[Niemand]

If you say "I am cold" in Mongolian, apparently it means you have syphilis/gonorrhea.

Wow!

Read this in a travel book. And apparently it gets very cold in Mongolia. Like -20.

[Lizzy60]

I have been prompted to learn other languages. Living in Texas, Spanish is a logical choice. It is coming along slowly....

I mentioned to our warehouse manager, who is from San Salvador, that I am having problems retaining. One of his helpers chimed in that I need to watch Telemundo.

Warehouse manager exclaimed, "NO!!!! She will become a Liberal!!!

There was a sister missionary years ago in a South American country talking in church. She was trying to say, "I'm embarrassed" [to be speaking in public] (something like that), but she didn't know the word for embarrassed and said "embarazada" which means pregnant - so she essentially said, "I'm pregnant." The audience was uncomfortable, until the error was realized.

A false friends couplet in regards to Spanish: Sopa no es soap, ropa no es rope, and butter is mantequilla ("meant to kill ya" is how it kind of sounds in English).

Sopa is soup
Ropa is clothing

And pregunta doesn't mean pregnant.

You have to be careful about translating things literally. If you say, "I am hot" in German, it means you are horny. If you say "I am cold" in Mongolian, apparently it means you have syphilis/gonorrhea.

Friends of mine in England told me that “crap” is considered as bad, or worse, than “sH!t”. Their ward comprises some American military families stationed on a base in the ward boundaries, and she said the gasp was audible one Sunday when an American woman told a story about cleaning out all the crap in her grandmother’s attic.

[Momma J]

Friends of mine in England told me that “crap” is considered as bad, or worse, than “sH!t”. Their ward comprises some American military families stationed on a base in the ward boundaries, and she said the gasp was audible one Sunday when an American woman told a story about cleaning out all the crap in her grandmother’s attic.

I asked a female missionary from England, who was having dinner at our house, if she would like a napkin. She kindly explained her embarrassment at the idea that we thought she might need a "diaper"

[Niemand]

Friends of mine in England told me that “crap” is considered as bad, or worse, than “sH!t”. Their ward comprises some American military families stationed on a base in the ward boundaries, and she said the gasp was audible one Sunday when an American woman told a story about cleaning out all the crap in her grandmother’s attic.

I asked a female missionary from England, who was having dinner at our house, if she would like a napkin. She kindly explained her embarrassment at the idea that we thought she might need a "diaper"

Might be confusion over a "nappy" which is what we call a diaper. "Napkin" for a serviette is perfectly fine English.

"Fanny" is an extremely rude word here (refers to lady parts), so when Americans talk about a "fanny pack" it sounds very bad. We call it a "bum bag", which would sound like a homeless person's kit to you. "Bum" here means your backside.

Oh and we call a cigarette a "fag". A friend of mine worked in the USA and said he was "popping out for a fag". It got a strange reaction from his co-workers.

"Spunk" and "spunky" are also bad words over here.

[Momma J]

[
Might be confusion over a "nappy" which is what we call a diaper. "Napkin" for a serviette is perfectly fine English.

"Fanny" is an extremely rude word here (refers to lady parts), so when Americans talk about a "fanny pack" it sounds very bad. We call it a "bum bag", which would sound like a homeless person's kit to you. "Bum" here means your backside.

Oh and we call a cigarette a "fag". A friend of mine worked in the USA and said he was "popping out for a fag". It got a strange reaction from his co-workers.

"Spunk" and "spunky" are also bad words over here.

Many years ago, I was chatting on a gun forum. We were discussing concealed carry and I mentioned that fanny packs are being made specifically to hold a hand gun, with an easy access pocket. I was told that no respectable woman would hide a gun in her fanny pack. (from my buddy on the other side of the pond)

[Silver Pie]

She probably misheard and thought they said nappy because us Americans often trail off at the end of our words.

Bum bag sounds better.

I'm very surprised at spunk and spunky. Here it's a positive statement, a compliment.

I read about a teenage girl doing the student exchange, going to England from the United States. Once, in class, her nose started bleeding. Here, we call that a bloody nose. She asked to be excused because she had a bloody nose. The class laughed, thought it was hilarious. The teacher informed her that she had a bleeding nose.

Friends of mine in England told me that “crap” is considered as bad, or worse, than “sH!t”. Their ward comprises some American military families stationed on a base in the ward boundaries, and she said the gasp was audible one Sunday when an American woman told a story about cleaning out all the crap in her grandmother’s attic.

I asked a female missionary from England, who was having dinner at our house, if she would like a napkin. She kindly explained her embarrassment at the idea that we thought she might need a "diaper"

Might be confusion over a "nappy" which is what we call a diaper. "Napkin" for a serviette is perfectly fine English.

"Fanny" is an extremely rude word here (refers to lady parts), so when Americans talk about a "fanny pack" it sounds very bad. We call it a "bum bag", which would sound like a homeless person's kit to you. "Bum" here means your backside.

Oh and we call a cigarette a "fag". A friend of mine worked in the USA and said he was "popping out for a fag". It got a strange reaction from his co-workers.

"Spunk" and "spunky" are also bad words over here.

[Wolfwoman]

A couple of comedians have finally come out with funny routines about the Covid shots.
Sorry I don’t know how to embed it.

https://youtu.be/8Hu3XlcBe38

[Niemand]

A couple of comedians have finally come out with funny routines about the Covid shots.
Sorry I don’t know how to embed it.

https://youtu.be/8Hu3XlcBe38

[Fred]

dog-kid-pray.jpg

[Fred]

biden pedos.jpg

[JuneBug12000]

This guy is tearing apart a CEO's argument for why people should work at an office instead of remotely. Funny part 5:53 to 6:25.

I don't know about you, but I'm pretty sure tasting, smelling and touching my coworkers would be considered harassment. Lol. Did an AI write this and he just didn't proofread well? This CEO is a lawsuit waiting to happen. Lol. "Next team building activity will be smelling your coworker. Go ahead. Lean right in. There. Now don't you feel like best friends?