Study Reveals: Fathers are Key to Their Children's Faith

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Rensai
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Study Reveals: Fathers are Key to Their Children's Faith

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I thought this was worth sharing.

from: http://www.dakotavoice.com/2010/06/stud ... ens-faith/
Study Reveals: Fathers are Key to Their Children’s Faith

By S. Michael Craven on June 20th, 2010
S. Michael Craven

S. Michael Craven

I am afraid that our culture in general (and as a result, many fathers themselves) has reduced the role of fatherhood to something nonessential or unnecessary. Many men today regard parenting as being primarily the mother’s role and somehow no longer associated with masculinity or “real” manhood.

Instead, many have succumbed to modern cultural caricatures—along with radically feminist psychology—and the label of hunter-gatherer, and thus assume this is their primary contribution to the family. As a result too many men, including professing Christian men, express their role as father exclusively in terms of financial provider. The fact is children are not looking for financial provision; they are looking for love, guidance, and a role model for what it means to be a man.

During the colonial period in America men defined themselves by their level of community involvement and fatherhood. Marriage and fatherhood were seen as being among the highest aspirations in a man’s life. This is likely due to the fact that people at that time were less individualistic. Today the highest aspirations of men seem to be career success and personal leisure; and against these they seek to balance marriage and family.

The lack of actively involved fathers has produced societal conditions necessary for the intervention of government. It is a sobering fact when the government is compelled to respond to the failure of such a fundamental institution as family! In 2001 the U.S. Department of Health & Human Services under President Bush launched its Fatherhood Initiative with this statement:

The President is determined to make committed, responsible fatherhood a national priority … [T]he presence of two committed, involved parents contributes directly to better school performance, reduced substance abuse, less crime and delinquency, fewer emotional and other behavioral problems, less risk of abuse or neglect, and lower risk of teen suicide. The research is clear: fathers factor significantly in the lives of their children. There is simply no substitute for the love, involvement, and commitment of a responsible father.

While the research does indeed show that paternal absence (whether it is physical or emotional) is a significant contributing factor in almost every category of societal ill, my concern is the spiritual consequence.

A rather obscure but large and important study conducted by the Swiss government in 1994 and published in 2000 revealed some astonishing facts with regard to the generational transmission of faith and religious values. (The full title of the study is: “The demographic characteristics of the linguistic and religious groups in Switzerland” by Werner Haug and Phillipe Warner of the Federal Statistical Office, Neuchatel. The study appears in Volume 2 of Population Studies No. 31, a book titled The Demographic Characteristics of National Minorities in Certain European States, edited by Werner Haug and others, published by the Council of Europe Directorate General III, Social Cohesion, Strasbourg, January 2000.)

In short, the study reveals that “It is the religious practice of the father of the family that, above all, determines the future attendance at or absence from church of the children.”

The study reported:

1. If both father and mother attend regularly, 33 percent of their children will end up as regular churchgoers, and 41 percent will end up attending irregularly. Only a quarter of their children will end up not practicing at all.
2. If the father is irregular and mother regular, only 3 percent of the children will subsequently become regulars themselves, while a further 59 percent will become irregulars. Thirty-eight percent will be lost.
3. If the father is nonpracticing and mother regular, only 2 percent of children will become regular worshippers, and 37 percent will attend irregularly. Over 60 percent of their children will be lost completely to the church!

Let us look at the figures the other way round. What happens if the father is regular but the mother irregular or nonpracticing? Extraordinarily, the percentage of children becoming regular goes up from 33 percent to 38 percent with the irregular mother and to 44 percent with the nonpracticing, as if loyalty to the father’s commitment grows in proportion to the mother’s laxity or indifference to religion.

In short, if a father does not go to church, no matter how faithful his wife’s devotions, only one child in 50 will become a regular worshipper. If a father does go regularly, regardless of the practice of the mother, between two-thirds and three-quarters of their children will become churchgoers (regular and irregular). One reason given for this distinction was that children tend to take their cues about domestic life from Mom while their conceptions of the world outside come from Dad. If Dad takes faith in God seriously then the implication for children is that God should be taken seriously.

This confirms the role of father as an essential spiritual leader, which I would argue is true fatherhood. Fathers are to love their wives as Christ loves the church, modeling the love of the Father in their most important earthly relationship. Fathers are to care for their children as our Father in heaven cares for us and finally, fathers are the ones to teach their children the truth about reality. It is the father who should instruct his children in their understanding of the world and everything in it using God’s revelation as the basis by which they analyze and respond to life’s challenges and opportunities. It is the father who is essential for sending his children forth with a biblical view of reality and a faith in Jesus Christ that is rooted in solid understanding and not merely blind tradition.

It is time for fathers to return to honorable manhood and reconsider their priorities and realign them with God’s commands, decrees, and laws, teaching these things to your children “when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, when you lie down, and when you rise” (Deuteronomy 6:7 NKJV).

Happy Father’s Day!

S. Michael Craven is the President of the Center for Christ & Culture. Michael is the author of Uncompromised Faith (Navpress).The Center for Christ & Culture is dedicated to renewal within the Church and works to equip Christians with an intelligent and thoroughly Christian approach to matters of culture in order to demonstrate the relevance of Christianity to all of life. For more information on the Center for Christ & Culture, the teaching ministry of S. Michael Craven, visit the Center for Christ & Culture.

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ready2prepare
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Re: Study Reveals: Fathers are Key to Their Children's Faith

Post by ready2prepare »

Thanks for posting this. :)

When I saw Obama's Father's Day
Proclamation I thought I was having a
bad dream...

...but then it got worse--I woke up!

I had two fathers in my life, both of whom
gave me valuable spiritual direction, but
they were both married--and not to each
other! :evil:

Best Regards,
Sharon in Mississippi

Squally
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Re: Study Reveals: Fathers are Key to Their Children's Faith

Post by Squally »

Very interesting article!

Amore Vero
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Re: Study Reveals: Fathers are Key to Their Children's Faith

Post by Amore Vero »

This study just further shows how when a father abandons his marriage covenants & wife, the children's faith is almost always destroyed. For if the Father does not honor his marriage covenants & the Gospel neither will most of his children. Thus, as some Church Leaders stand by & let fathers divorce & abandon their wives & children, instead doing their duty to protect women & children from such, it just causes the Church to get closer & closer to destruction. No Church or society that allows divorce can endure for long.

Thus we can see how true this quote is: "The greatest thing a Father can do for his children is to love their Mother."

And one of the 'worst' things a Father can do to his children is to abandon or neglect their mother."

Fiannan
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Re: Study Reveals: Fathers are Key to Their Children's Faith

Post by Fiannan »

I have seen as many women in the Church file for divorce because they "grew apart" or "did not feel deep love anymore" so it is not a case of men running off. I believe that 2/3 of all filings for divorce are done by the wife. In some of these cases all it would have taken was a bishop or a stake president to call the wife to re-evaluate her choices, but these leaders had about as much courage and strenght as a bowl of soggy noodles. In none of these cases involving children are the children active in the church anymore. When a woman slices out the priesthood from her home, in an act that reminds one of what Nephi did to his cousin Laban, she undercuts any authority the priesthood symbolizes.

e-eye
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Re: Study Reveals: Fathers are Key to Their Children's Faith

Post by e-eye »

Amore Vero wrote: Thus, as some Church Leaders stand by & let fathers divorce & abandon their wives & children, instead doing their duty to protect women & children from such, it just causes the Church to get closer & closer to destruction. No Church or society that allows divorce can endure for long."
Vero - what are talking about? the Lords church is not that of force. We are taught and left to choose our own path we can't force fathers or mothers to stay with their families. Vero are you LDS? Just wondering as it may explain why your opinions in regards to men and women vary so much compared to those of the teaching of the church.

Amore Vero
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Re: Study Reveals: Fathers are Key to Their Children's Faith

Post by Amore Vero »

e-eye wrote: Vero - what are talking about? the Lords church is not that of force. We are taught and left to choose our own path we can't force fathers or mothers to stay with their families. Vero are you LDS? Just wondering as it may explain why your opinions in regards to men and women vary so much compared to those of the teaching of the church.
A Church leader's #1 responsibility is to protect the women & children of his ward, stake or church from the abuse, adultery or abandonment of their husband or father. Which happens to be rampant in every ward today.

True, the Church is not a church of force, but neither does the Church allow men to divorce their wives unjustifiably & go find someone new. Such is adultery, abuse & abandonment, which has always come with discipline, usually excommunication. But some leaders are not applying such consequences & looking the other way.

Amore Vero
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Re: Study Reveals: Fathers are Key to Their Children's Faith

Post by Amore Vero »

Fiannan wrote:I have seen as many women in the Church file for divorce because they "grew apart" or "did not feel deep love anymore" so it is not a case of men running off. I believe that 2/3 of all filings for divorce are done by the wife.
True, many women are filing for divorce today, but most are because their husband is controlling & abusive or committing adultery in some form. Pres. Hinckley said that men are usually the cause of most divorces. Many men still feel they have a right to control their wife in certain ways, like have the last say in decision making & disrespect her equal position & power in the marriage & home. Women have been forced by men to put up with such disrespect & control for 6000 years & now they have a way out to safety, which many now are taking.

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ChelC
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Re: Study Reveals: Fathers are Key to Their Children's Faith

Post by ChelC »

Amore Vero wrote:Women have been forced by men to put up with such disrespect & control for 6000 years & now they have a way out to safety, which many now are taking.
I don't know anyone who is 6000 years old... but I don't get around that much.

Honestly, I don't understand your point of view and I think it's dangerous. It's as though you would dismiss a woman's flaws because past generations might have been oppressed. I'm not punished for the transgression of my great grandfathers - nor am I victimized by it.

Here and now women are buying the lie that they are superior to men, that they don't need them, that single parenting is preferable to a demanding/controlling spouse. It's a lie that Satan has used to destroy families.

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Rensai
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Re: Study Reveals: Fathers are Key to Their Children's Faith

Post by Rensai »

As long as we're talking about Dad's... I just got this sent to me today. Its funny.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fZa7hU6t ... r_embedded

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Rensai
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Re: Study Reveals: Fathers are Key to Their Children's Faith

Post by Rensai »

ChelC wrote:
Amore Vero wrote:Women have been forced by men to put up with such disrespect & control for 6000 years & now they have a way out to safety, which many now are taking.
I don't know anyone who is 6000 years old... but I don't get around that much.

Honestly, I don't understand your point of view and I think it's dangerous. It's as though you would dismiss a woman's flaws because past generations might have been oppressed. I'm not punished for the transgression of my great grandfathers - nor am I victimized by it.

Here and now women are buying the lie that they are superior to men, that they don't need them, that single parenting is preferable to a demanding/controlling spouse. It's a lie that Satan has used to destroy families.
Couldn't agree more. Well said ChelC.

Nan
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Re: Study Reveals: Fathers are Key to Their Children's Faith

Post by Nan »

My brother's second wife divorced him. Even after the Bishop told her she was making a mistake that would be destructive to her life and that she would not find it easy to find someone else who would love and take care of her like my brother had and furthermore that he would easily find someone else. I find many people ignore the church leaders.

I personally am a bit disappointed by the men in the church. I feel like many of them have given up. I desperately want them to stand up and lead their families spiritually and to stop expecting their wives to carry the family spiritually. It is too heavy of a burden for us to carry alone.

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Rensai
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Re: Study Reveals: Fathers are Key to Their Children's Faith

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Nan wrote: I personally am a bit disappointed by the men in the church. I feel like many of them have given up. I desperately want them to stand up and lead their families spiritually and to stop expecting their wives to carry the family spiritually. It is too heavy of a burden for us to carry alone.
Maybe you just aren't seeing it? This is probably an exaggeration, but hardly a week goes by AT CHURCH, that I don't hear some crack about women being better than men. That's not exactly an environment conducive to men showing that they can/do lead their families in any way. Many of us, ignore or silently suffer, the casual sexism that is rampant in the church today; but that doesn't mean we are doing the same at home. :)

Fiannan
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Re: Study Reveals: Fathers are Key to Their Children's Faith

Post by Fiannan »

Rensai wrote:
Nan wrote: I personally am a bit disappointed by the men in the church. I feel like many of them have given up. I desperately want them to stand up and lead their families spiritually and to stop expecting their wives to carry the family spiritually. It is too heavy of a burden for us to carry alone.
Maybe you just aren't seeing it? This is probably an exaggeration, but hardly a week goes by AT CHURCH, that I don't hear some crack about women being better than men. That's not exactly an environment conducive to men showing that they can/do lead their families in any way. Many of us, ignore or silently suffer, the casual sexism that is rampant in the church today; but that doesn't mean we are doing the same at home. :)
Absolutely true. Men are the ones looking at porn, men are the ones yelling at their kids, en are the ones who are not being considerate of their spouses, men are the ones...

Come on, I know a lot of guys that are jerks, but so to are a lot of women. I think we need to honor tradition, but there are some portions of tradition (women can do no wrong) that need to be abandoned.

I will also note that there are bishops that immediately encourage husbands who are kicked out of their families to re-marry and that this will provide their sons an image that their fathers are not losers. I have seen many good LDS men who some wife will just asume will never find anyone as good as her, who wind up with better wives the second time around. I have also known men who just become total outcastes and can never find the courage to go out and get another wife. I have noticed that the men who DO find someone better tend to wind up with better relationships with their kids despite who has custody.

I have wondered though, what is the best situation after a divorce? Both parents remain true to the Church, both parents abandon the Church, husband goes innactive, wife goes innactive? One wonders what must go through children's minds when they hear about "eternal Familes" from a parent that kicks a spouse out for no scripturally valid reason. Sometimes I think it is better for the kids in such circumstances that the person who did not file for divorce stay active and the one who did file just stop going to church. It might be better for the kids in that way.

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