Humor - what's so funny?
- Niemand
- Level 34 Illuminated
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Re: Humor - what's so funny?
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- Niemand
- Level 34 Illuminated
- Posts: 14196
Re: Humor - what's so funny?
Today in the Ukraine.
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- Silver Pie
- seeker after Christ
- Posts: 9074
- Location: In the state that doesn't exist
Re: Humor - what's so funny?
And, conversely, the plexiglass protected the cashier from the customer, who had handled every item the cashier ran through the register. Twice, even. Once to pick it up off the shelf and again to put it on the conveyor belt.
uh-oh
- Thinker
- Level 34 Illuminated
- Posts: 13101
- Location: The Universe - wherever that is.
Re: Humor - what's so funny?
One interpretation of not being lukewarm or not being paralyzed with fear of screwing up…
1 Minute Lecture:
How we can find out, how much we want to find out & what it takes to get there…
(Warning: some cussing)
https://youtube.com/shorts/EYEDD2l0YUw?feature=share
1 Minute Lecture:
How we can find out, how much we want to find out & what it takes to get there…
(Warning: some cussing)
https://youtube.com/shorts/EYEDD2l0YUw?feature=share
- Fred
- Level 34 Illuminated
- Posts: 7739
- Location: Zion
Re: Humor - what's so funny?
The humor thread is just below Outer Darkness
Truisms!
1.Today a man knocked on my door and asked for a small donation towards the local swimming pool, so I gave him a glass of water.
2. I changed my password to "incorrect" so whenever I forget it the computer will say, "Your password is incorrect."
3. Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.
4. I'm great at multi-tasking. I can waste time, be unproductive, and procrastinate all at once.
5. If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.
6. Doesn't expecting the unexpected mean that the unexpected is actually expected?
7. Take my advice — I'm not using it.
8. Hospitality is the art of making guests feel like they're at home when you wish they were.
9. Television may insult your intelligence, but nothing rubs it in like a computer.
10. I bought a vacuum cleaner six months ago and so far all it's been doing is gathering dust.
11. Every time someone comes up with a foolproof solution, along comes a more-talented fool.
12. If you keep your feet firmly on the ground, you'll have trouble putting on your pants.
13. A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.
14. Ever stop to think and forget to start again?
15. When I married Ms. Right, I had no idea her first name was Always.
16. My wife got 8 out 10 on her driver's test. The other two guys managed to jump out of her way.
17. There may be no excuse for laziness, but I'm still looking.
18. Women spend more time wondering what men are thinking than men spend thinking.
19. Give me ambiguity or give me something else.
20. He who laughs last thinks slowest.
21. Is it wrong that only one company makes the game Monopoly?
22. Women sometimes make fools of men, but most guys are the D-I-Y type.
23. I was going to give him a nasty look, but he already had one.
24. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
25. The grass may be greener on the other side but at least you don't have to mow it.
Truisms!
1.Today a man knocked on my door and asked for a small donation towards the local swimming pool, so I gave him a glass of water.
2. I changed my password to "incorrect" so whenever I forget it the computer will say, "Your password is incorrect."
3. Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.
4. I'm great at multi-tasking. I can waste time, be unproductive, and procrastinate all at once.
5. If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.
6. Doesn't expecting the unexpected mean that the unexpected is actually expected?
7. Take my advice — I'm not using it.
8. Hospitality is the art of making guests feel like they're at home when you wish they were.
9. Television may insult your intelligence, but nothing rubs it in like a computer.
10. I bought a vacuum cleaner six months ago and so far all it's been doing is gathering dust.
11. Every time someone comes up with a foolproof solution, along comes a more-talented fool.
12. If you keep your feet firmly on the ground, you'll have trouble putting on your pants.
13. A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.
14. Ever stop to think and forget to start again?
15. When I married Ms. Right, I had no idea her first name was Always.
16. My wife got 8 out 10 on her driver's test. The other two guys managed to jump out of her way.
17. There may be no excuse for laziness, but I'm still looking.
18. Women spend more time wondering what men are thinking than men spend thinking.
19. Give me ambiguity or give me something else.
20. He who laughs last thinks slowest.
21. Is it wrong that only one company makes the game Monopoly?
22. Women sometimes make fools of men, but most guys are the D-I-Y type.
23. I was going to give him a nasty look, but he already had one.
24. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
25. The grass may be greener on the other side but at least you don't have to mow it.
- Thinker
- Level 34 Illuminated
- Posts: 13101
- Location: The Universe - wherever that is.
Re: Humor - what's so funny?
Good ones!Fred wrote: ↑October 9th, 2022, 9:08 pm The humor thread is just below Outer Darkness
Truisms!
1.Today a man knocked on my door and asked for a small donation towards the local swimming pool, so I gave him a glass of water.
2. I changed my password to "incorrect" so whenever I forget it the computer will say, "Your password is incorrect."..
6. Doesn't expecting the unexpected mean that the unexpected is actually expected?
7. Take my advice — I'm not using it.
11. Every time someone comes up with a foolproof solution, along comes a more-talented fool…
13. A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing…
18. Women spend more time wondering what men are thinking than men spend thinking…
25. The grass may be greener on the other side but at least you don't have to mow it.
Re:
6) Remember to forget.
25) The grass is always greener on the side with more BS.
Last edited by Thinker on October 10th, 2022, 5:41 pm, edited 1 time in total.
- Thinker
- Level 34 Illuminated
- Posts: 13101
- Location: The Universe - wherever that is.
Re: Humor - what's so funny?
That video could be seen as a quick lecture before we all came to earth, if you define “FA” as experimenting/active faith. I like how he starts out with “how much do you want to find out”? I really imagine many of us contemplated that before this life, knowing that “finding out” may be learned the hard way sometimes.Thinker wrote: ↑October 9th, 2022, 12:53 pm One interpretation of not being lukewarm or not being paralyzed with fear of screwing up…
1 Minute Lecture:
How we can find out, how much we want to find out & what it takes to get there…
(Warning: some cussing)
https://youtube.com/shorts/EYEDD2l0YUw?feature=share
Follow up, to the above video but defining “FA” as really screwing around, doing what we know we shouldn’t… this guy makes a valid rebuttal:
(again: some cussing)
https://youtu.be/mH9NzJwldok
- Chip
- Level 34 Illuminated
- Posts: 7961
- Location: California
Re: Humor - what's so funny?
Beware the Grabblers and Blabblers. Be sure to read the video description.
https://www.bitchute.com/video/cHK123hRQdKP/
https://www.bitchute.com/video/cHK123hRQdKP/
- Original_Intent
- Level 34 Illuminated
- Posts: 13076
Re: Humor - what's so funny?
It's there to protect the cashier, not you, silly consumer. So they get to touch everything that you previously touched to put into your cart.
edit: I see Silver Pie beat me to the punch line...
- Cruiserdude
- Level 34 Illuminated
- Posts: 5464
- Location: SEKS
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- captain of 1,000
- Posts: 2600
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- captain of 1,000
- Posts: 2600
Re: Humor - what's so funny?
That's why they go to jail.
And he can't fight very well either.
Nomatter.
According to some.
As long as he bees rapp'n 'bout freedums.
It's all good.
One of the good guys.
Sir FABBO ought to know.
He was an OG Wigger once.
LOL
Sir H
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- captain of 1,000
- Posts: 2600
Re: Humor - what's so funny?
Damn.
At least she admits who she works for.
Probably get reelected in a landside too.
Sir H
- madvin
- captain of 1,000
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- Location: Stillwater OK