Funny stuff

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Joel
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Joel
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Joel
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Joel
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EmmaLee
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Got the Christmas tree up -

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Joel
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Joel
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Joel
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Joel
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righteousrepublic
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Tim Hawkins - A Whiff of Kansas


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righteousrepublic
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I'm all the time taking words or phrases and switching letters around to see what comes up. Recently, we had Amy Coney Barrett be part of the Supreme Court. So I switched letters around and came up with A Boney Carrett. I also found these anagrams among many: Martyr By Acetone, Batty Money Racer

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Joel
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righteousrepublic
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Silver Pie
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In honor of insane lockdowns, a song to bring a smile to your face.


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righteousrepublic
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I am working very hard to up my attitude, so please, up yours.
A note to men from a custodian...I aim to please, so you aim, too, please.

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righteousrepublic
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1948 HITS ARCHIVE: Woody Woodpecker - Sportsmen & Mel Blanc (a cappella)


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righteousrepublic
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I'm selling my white privilege card. It's over 65 years old but it's in mint condition. It has never been used, not even one time.

Reason for selling is that it hasn't done one thing for me! No free college, no free food, no free housing, no free anything.

I actually had to go to work every day of my life while paying a boatload of taxes to carry those who chose not to work!

If you are interested, I prefer cash but would be willing to do an even trade for a Race Card which seems much more widely accepted and comes with countless benefits if you fit the profile!

Interested? Contact me on my Non-Obama cell phone that I pay for every month…

Serious buyers only!

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righteousrepublic
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The first time I heard about paraprosdokians, I liked them. Paraprosdokians are figures of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected and is frequently humorous. (Sir Winston Churchill loved them.)

1. Where there's a will, I want to be in it.
2. The last thing I want to do is hurt you ...but it's still on my list.
3. Since light travels faster than sound, some people appear bright until you hear them speak
4. If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong.
5. We never really grow up -- we only learn how to act in public.
6. War does not determine who is right, only who is left.
7. Knowledge, is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.
8. To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.
9. I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.
10. In filling out an application, where it says, "In case of an emergency, notify..." I answered "a doctor.
11. Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.
12. You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice
13. I used to be indecisive, but now I'm not so sure
14. To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target.
15. Going to church doesn't make you a Christian, any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.
16. You're never too old to learn something stupid.
17. I'm supposed to respect my elders, but it's getting harder and harder for me to find someone older than me.
18. May I drop you off someplace, say, the roof?
19. Person one, "Did you spread gun powder on your face this morning?" Person two, "No, why?" Person one, "Because it looks shot."

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Good & Global
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Can you please change this Scriptural TikTok image? This is 2023: A raised fist to show solidarity of BLM support not a spear which is offensive to indigenous Nephites and a Ukraine flag on the guy's back instead of a semi automatic assault bow

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Fred
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